Missed Addictions
by HandsInPockets
Summary: Here's a one-shot I wrote at 3:00 a.m. it's in Dipper POV, he's 15 and taking life pretty harsh for a kid. He just misses the old days of mystery, but are his addictions are getting the better of him than anything else.


Three years later, and I already feel like my life is almost over. I sit down on top of the shack every sunset thinking sunrays will give me answers. Everyday passes with the same result, I come up, sit down, take the pack of cigarettes and zippo from my cap and wait for the sun to go behind the horizon. Every puff, every ash, anything that made me feel like I could taste something again made me feel human. If Mabel ever found out about this, I know she'd get angry, start crying and tell Stan no questions asked. I love her, but there are somethings you can't share with family. Sometimes I wake up coughing, and usually blame it on my spit. Mabel worries that I might choke one day,and for all I know she's right.

Ever since everything stopped, all the mysteries and creatures of this place vanished, everything has become boring and normal. It'sgotten to the point where I didn't feel any purpose anymore, any reason to live. I'm not suicidal, I just lack any determination or motivation to do almost anything. Depression, is the best way to put it, but melancholy really hits home.

My relationship with my family is still good, they don't really notice when I'm in this state. That's probably a good thing, or else they would've probably found my pack. I went up to the roof again, to repeat my daily rut. I smoke 1-2 cigarettes every sunset, to just save myself some cash and time to get more. I got the pack from my cap and found out I had 2 cigarettes left.

"Shit" I sighed. I shrugged my shoulders and proceeded anyway. "I'll just get that guy behind the store to buy me more tomorrow." I put the biri in my mouth and was about to light it, but the damn thing would only spark and wouldn't make a fire. "Are you serious right now?" I said to my zippo in annoyance. Still trying to spark it, I heard someone come up to the roof. I quickly put the cigs and lighter in my hat and put it back on my head. I didn't turn around, I didn't want anymore suspicious than I already did.

"Dipper?" I heard a call, I could tell it was Mabel easily.

"Yeah?" I answered.

"Someone's here to see you." Mabel said, I turned around and found Wendy standing on the roof walking towards the edge to me. My heart tighten, as well as my breathing. She was beautiful as she had her hair in a bun in the back but had bangs in the front. She wore a grey button jacket with dark blue jeans and still had her boots on, but these were cleaner ones.

"Thanks Mabel" Wendy said.

"No problem, I'll just leave you too alone. We'll catch up later Wendy." Mabel said as she started to leave.

"Sounds awesome." Wendy replied. I stood up and walked over to her speechless. She smiled wide. "What's up Dipper, it's been a while." She said as we both went in for a hug. I forgot what her hugs felt like, they were more safe, more soft, much warmer than anyone I ever knew.

"Oh my God. Wendy, I can't believe you're home. When did you get into town?"I was astound that I could barely even ask the questions in my head. We broke from the hug with her still smiling.

"Literally like 15 minutes ago, this was my first stop. Not even my family know I'm home yet." She said as she sat down on the roof. She put herself on the edge and saw the sunset waiting to happen. She patted the spot next to her as an invitation for me. I sat down next to her to catch upon whatever she's doing in life.

"So how's college?" I asked breifly. She shrugged and smirked at the question.

"It's college, nothing great. Deffinitly better than high school though, much less drama with people." I saw Wendy's smile started to slowly fade. "The only thing worse is the work and due dates. It does a hell of a number, stress is pretty much 40% of me now a days." She said rubbing her eyes then staring back at the half sun.

"That's harsh dude, I'm glad I don't have to deal with that yet." I empathized. She chuckled softly while not making eye contact. We both went back to looking at the sun with not much to say, It's been so long since I've had anything interesting to say. Plus, I always sucked at talking to Wendy growing up. I saw a little flare on the corner of my eye. Wendy had a lighter in her hand and turning the flame on and off.

"What's that for?" I asked.

"Hm? Oh, it's just sometimes on campus people want a light if they don't have one. So I carry one for convenience." She explained.

"So you just waste money on lighters?" I asked.

"It's not really a waste, I only light them up if they give me one." She said. I became a little surprised to hear that from her.

"Wait, you smoke?" I said.

"Not really, I only do every now and then. It helps with college bullshit and it's better to spend a dollar on a lighter than a pack for 6." She said still lighting the flame every now and then. I looked at her face staring at the in and out flame in her hands. I take off my hat and pull out my last two cigarettes. I held one of them out over to her.

"Hey" I called. She looked over at me and her eyebrows raised when she saw one cigarettes in my hand and another in my mouth.

"You smoke?" She asked. I nodded.

"Sadly, yeah." I said with remorse. "Please don't tell anyone." I said.

"I'll keep your secret if you keep mine." She said. Wendy slowly took the cigarette from my hand and placed it in her mouth. She lit the lighter again and sparked both our cancer sticks. I don't know what it was about this cigarette, but it tasted horrible. I didn't get any sensation after seeing that face on Wendy.

"You probably think I'm gross." I said. She puffed a blow from her mouth.

"Nah." she wrapped her arm aound me. "I think you're pretty cute actually." She said, My heart rushed a little, but I still laughed at the compliment. "Just don't let it become what you're known for. You're way better than nicotine dude." She said looking at the sunset over the pine trees. Her words were making me weak. Not the weak I've been feeling for some time now, but the kind that warms your chest and your cheeks. I finished my cigarette and put in out at the bottom of my shoe. I stored it in the packet to throw away later. Wendy looked like she still had a puff or two left on hers.

"Hey Dipper, you ever done shotgunning?" She asked looking at the last of her cigarette.

"No, what's that?" I asked. Wendy then took one last puff from what was left of her cigarette and kissed me. Blowing the smoke into my mouth. I closed my eyes and took in every second I could. After we broke I blew the smoke from my mouth as she put out her butt on her shoe. She put it in the pack.

"Hey." I called, she turned around and I kissed her again. She wrapped her arms around my neck and pulled me in. I grabbed her waste and held her much longer than our last kiss. We broke, and we were both smiling.

"I gotta go home right now. Let's continue this tomorrow." She said. I let here go and watched here go down the ladder back to the shop. I looked over at the mountains and saw that it was clearly night time. I can't remember last time I left here smiling. After that kiss, it was way better than anything I've ever had. Sharing that puff with Wendy made me realize cigarettes were never my drive. It was her, the soft cherry flavored lips I can't get enough of are way better than the dirty burned taste of any cigarette. On that note, she's what I've ever wanted.

-The End


End file.
